Conservapedia:What is going on at CP?

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Keep up to date with all the insanity at extremist Christian conservative blog Conservapedia right here. This page is for rolling reports of the strange, contradictory or humorous activity at Conservapedia. 

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What is going on?

• Ed banhammers User:TrueValues as a parodist for removing relevant sourced material from the Lemski article and calling it "liberal drivel". However, when Andy removes the same material, calling it "political forms of recognition", that's a-okay!
• Ohmugawsh. Not only is Obama a liar, a Muslim, stupid, Anti-American and unsaved, but a fascist too.
• An important new term... pulled outta my ass.
• Bugler tells Kevin not to be embittered over not getting edit rights, despite Kevin's 150+ contributions. Kevin, alas for Bugler, is not a moron. It's almost like there are consequences to sysops indulging personal whims and treating editors like dirt.
• Yes, We Know You Lack The Imagination To Make Your Own Headers But This Is Just Silly.
• Yeah, we try to avoid doing that, except when we don't. ORLY? This can take a while to load
• Bugler doesn't get how burden of proof works
• This kind of taunting is not allowed, we respect person's own talk pages...except, you know, to warn of blocking, thas okay!
• Andy tells user Dotherightthing to change his username to his first name and last initial. What do you think the odds are that he won't deign to make the same request of new boytoy "Bugler?" ...unless he already did, and infant Bugle Richards had parents who already hated him.
• After removing liberal support, TrueValues was told by Argon to stop and by Henry to stop. After Andy did it, Argon expected for Andy to be treated the same way. TrueValues put it back, against Andy's wishes. Then Henry admits that truth is subjective. Ouch.
• RationalWiki hits the big time.... if Andy sticking his tongue out is considered the big time
• Wheel war!
• Andy has a new best friend!
• Daphnea leaves a parthian shot. & Bungler bans for life (see also user:SusanG/Daphnea for a full Parthian.) CPAdmin1 disagrees with Bungler and unblocks.
• Roger Schlafly just missed achieving his life's dream as proclaimed on CP's main page. Funny, I thought gluttony was one of the seven deadly sins!
• Even Conservatives hate CP now. Just because things have a way of vanishing, have some screen shots
• Let's analyse LT's latest massacre: Saying he writes for children makes sense, that's true.... Not giving any alternative views is standard CP protocol... Demotion from novel to book to make him sound like Dr. Seuss, sure... No awards, he's too liberal, yes.... but... wait, why the change in modifier from "Only one" to "A." Did "A" become more conservative lately?
• LT craps all over other user's work, demanding sources. The original user obliges, providing sources for just about every sentence. LT reverts again, apparently just because he feels like it
• Turn away from prayer, end up 400 million dollars in debt. Turn towards it, end up 9.1 trillion dollars in debt.
• PJR on Ed's talk: "These (part) sections were archived too. Leaving /part/ of a conversation here making it look like a claim wasn't answered could be considered deceitful, and we wouldn't want that, would we?"
  Ed: Actually, I would want that. Bugger off. UPDATE: Trouble in paradise, PJR completely pwns Uncle Ed
• CP in a nutshell.
  JDavidson: "Hi Ed, I was given a warning while the sysop who did the same thing I did got away without anything. Are you going to warn him, too?"
  Ed: *blocks*
  Wandering: "Why did you block him? He just pointed out that Kara wasn't warned despite having committed the same violation..."
  Ed: *blocks*
  

As a bonus, Ed says what we all already knew.

• Barack Obama was allegedly Born in the U.S.A.! But if he wasn't... omigod, he can't be President of Andy!!!
• Andy has "peer reviewed many papers" himself!. Fafuksake who for?!!!!
• Andy to wandals: "Bring it on!"
• Want to know how to spot an anti-Semite? Just look for the missing vowels.
• "You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy." Okay, maybe just villainy.
• This just in, Ed doesn't understand the concept of peer review either
• Karajou posts a link degrading the public school system, but doesn't notice the glaring grammatical errorsin his post
• Kowardjou continues his adult streak, reverting back his version of a page, locking it to ensure it stays that way and screaming MINE on the talk page
• Some anonymous people on the internet admit something may be true, therefore it is. Also, we won't say exactly where to read it, lest you find out we're putting words in his mouth.
• Why does this seem slightly ironic?
• Still taking a pounding from the Lenski Debacle, Andy has returned to his second favorite pastime: threateningusers and whitewashing anything that makes him look stupid
• Next time, Ken, at least attempt to ensure your links match your text; it's beyond obvious in this case
• Way to go Koward, that's exactly how an adult makes intelligent conversation
• The kissing-up meter reaches level "brown", and will soon break when honorary Conservapedian and Conservative Award Nominee Phyllis Schlafly is presented with the Phyllis Schlafly Award for conservativism.
• The right to keep and bear arms, recently upheld by the Supreme Court, is a triumph of Justice Scalia's textualism in interpreting the law. If textualism suits you and your interests, it's just fine.
• This site is growing rapidly! Reality has such a liberal bias.
• In yet another segment of our NOVA series on assholes, we notice this particular specimen furtively thieving away archive links. Note the beautiful plumage on this one, and hideous amounts of deception oozing from his slime ducts as he hides the odoriferous waste of the rest of his tribe. Update: PJR says "No". He's too good for that place...
• The irony here is that the jerky one doesn't mean Andy: No, your edits were not a problem. It was the edits of those individuals who decided to use this talk page as an attack forum. hint: Our favorite bag o' bluster is referring to the Andy's cover up of his own venom on the Lenski incident talk page
• Kenji explains at length how Andy and Co. are guilty of all the things they like to accuse Liberals of. Karajou is too stupid to comprehend what he's saying, and censors it, then smites the filthy heretic. (Note the comment on the ban.)
• Paranoid much? Maybe it is because deep inside you think the "smear" is accurate.
• A good way to endear yourself to Andy is to block his future son-in-law as a "Purveyor of filth" for including a link to a Christian Porn Site.
• Poe's Law is universal, but nowhere else it is as strong as it is in Conservapedia.
• Question. Answer. Removed! Re-answer. Re-removed! "Was this removed by accident?" No. OH & btw Karajou, "You're a wuss!"

And yet again!

• Reproducing Lenski's experiment? Why waste time with it, it doesn't support evolution anyway, says PJR.
• As usual, the left hand doesn't know WTF the right hand is up to: Even while LT preaches that truth, respect and non-judgmental style should be used while editing, Ken keeps "improving" one of CP's most biased, disrespectful and judging entries.
• Dr. Lenski beware, Andrew Schlafly has only begun to fight! We must all stay tuned and he will get back to us as soon as he finishes that whole FBI thing.
• Conservative's new great effort: Atheism and deceit User:Conservative/Atheism and deceit after move Atheism and deceit - and no matter how much Deborah complains, it will remain locked. Precious. Ssssmine. My precious, nasty little gurl sharn't haz it.
• It's Learn Together's sad duty to decide who is a Christian and who isn't. And he apparently decided that Jack Chick is one of "those who in word and deed live the Christian message". Update: It's nice to be seen.
• Saying that Hitler called himself a Christian will get you banned for infinity - as well as the other 65,535 IPs in your range.
• Some of the links below won't work, because DeanS burned his own talk page in order to save it.
• Hey, Ultimahero, let me rearrange your castle for a while. UPDATE No! leave him alone!.
• Burgler accuses Tim of starting an auto da fe. Update: Yeah, I'm sure its Poor Ed's rights of expression those that are being denied.
• Ed is in action again: first by harassing PJR, then with some wonderful irony, finally giving a 1 day block for this. UPDATE: Pwnd.
• "No, Mommy, I don't know what is going on. I have been banging my head against the wall over and over, but it's still there. I still don't get it."
• Desperate for DeanS Step one: Get rid of those facts, we're better off believing a sysop if it means bringing him back! Step two: discredit the opposition. Step three: bully, threaten, and demand. Update: A fair-minded Christian voice in the wilderness.
• Yes, clearly this pillar of genius was worthy of block rights.
• Yeah, we're moving on up/ to the East Side!
• Bugler has turned into Assfly's guard dog, warns AaronP to stop saying Assfly called Lenski a lying cheat. Update: Now he's trying to turn the missing link into the new FBI. Update: ZTak: Please, mind your own business - Bugler: No, YOU mind your own business!
• Conservapedia went down, around 12:00 EST, 24th June 2008. Await developments. UDPATE CP is back up. A user asks why it was down for 5 hours and receives a full and frank explanation from Andy.
• Professor Lenski pwns Schlafly, BSE, JD; overuses the word "acolyte". Summary of reply to request: We will of course release the data and the raw materials to competent scientists, though if you had bothered to learn to read you would see it is all in the paper. Summary of pwnage: too wonderful to summarize. Read it yourself. Taking bets on how long it takes for "angry outbursts" to make the professor values list. (A temporary copy of Dr. Lenski's reply is here, since Conservapedia seems to be having trouble processing http: requests tonight in a timely fashion.) Update:Yep, talk about the attitude, dismiss the data, makes perfect sense logically. Less Delete any possible reference to RatWiki. Attaboy, Andy! You hear me talkin' fundie-pwning boy? I ain't through with you by a damn sight! I'm gonna... Stay tuned!
• How will they fill the gaps by the sysops leaving? Simple, promote the worst sort to fill their shoes. Note: He still cannot Move, Protect nor Delete individual pages. Though he can lock the database.
• "A start" on more Lenski-bashing?
• According to cp:condom the condom (which doesn't need to be defined) is not as effective at birth control as fidelity. It would seem that you can't get pregnant if you don't screw around. And it prevents teen pregrancy. Update: In an ironic move, Ed protects the article.
• Learn together reverts the Philip Pullman article to a better version, containing wonderful prose like 'Critics brand his books subversively anti-religious. Defenders say it's all good fun.'
• Due process is for the weak.
• USA and Poland reject Theory of Evolution. United Nations in disarray.
• Now KevinM (who he?) accuses Andy of calling the Holy See liars. Update(s) Just read the whole thing, particularly: "I've already spent far too much time on this issue when more pressing issues need attention. But I looked again at this entry and found it to be 100% correct" from the infallible Pope Andy. Moer There's no stopping KevinM. DoubleMoer PJR is ice cold.
• That deceitful Dawkins allegedly managed to sneak into Expelled by using his real name "Clinton" - that alone was enough to fool everybody into letting in a guy with the last name "Dawkins" who also happened to look like Richard Dawkins.
• Welcome to "CP in a nutshell"!
  STATSMSN: Ken, you never addressed my arguments satisfactorily. This dialogue is becoming quite futile.
  ANDY: Die, alien scum!
  Hey, Andy? MYOB.
• Is PJR is planning to go out in a blaze of glory? This reply isn't going to win him many friends amongst the sysops. Good to see PJR standing up for the little people - finally a sysop has realised what their purpose is. How long until he gets slapped back into line, however? The counter starts.... now. Update: Andy is pwned by PJR! Update2: ...and the debate is ended with slappage.
• Ed Poor demonstrates just how clueless he is about other cultures
• Stand aside Sun Myung Moon Ban Ki-moon! SuperWikiConflictResolutionMan to the rescue.
• Andy cravenly begs Dan to stay... by rehashing the same old crap about Obama not being a Christian.
• Oh noes, Crocite is gone! Now who will post up all those blog entries news headlines??
• That's all fine and well, Croco. However, when exactly same methods (using biased sources, portraying the statements and actions of single persons as representative for the entire topic, etc.) are used to portray atheism as evil, that's cool?
• Completely lacking any of the intellectual tools needed to participate in a debate, let alone ever win one, Conservative takes the George Aiken response to getting pwned by StatsMsn: declare victory and leave. Update: But what do you do when the debate continues? Easy: Misrepresent results, pretend you're not interested, fling out thinly veiled insults and rely on Andy to take care of things while your opponent does pretty much the opposite of last wordism.
• Instead of writing articles about unimportant crap like the Hoover Dam, CP sysops like Conservative write about the truly pressing issues like homosexual bathhouses and disease! Update: You're welcome, Bugler.
• Upon leaving the polling station, some voters have reported being set upon by a besuited goon. Just another day of wonderful Conservapedian justice. Incidentally: StatsFan has been blocked under the 90/10 rule four times now -- he's breaking the 90/10:4/1 rule! Get 'im, boys! UPDATE: WERD.
• Andy's New Rule: "You're perfectly welcome to talk with me as long as you repeat what I say . . . My new rule is in effect below this line ..."
• Moar! MOAR POWER!Cue maniacal laughter.
• You know the next Great Purge is coming when more folks sign this and this instead of this.
• Beware, Conservative has (hopefully) moved on from mindless forum/blog spamming/trolling and now approaches Viral Marketing (Image backup since Ken has a habit of deleting his link lists every couple of hours). Update: Woosh! Down the memory hole.
• Since Lenski hasn't responded in 48 hours, Andy declares this a refusal to release the data and will now contact the editor-in-chief of the journal PNAS because the journal must have violated its own policies. Update: Andy's own dubious "scientific facts" are called into question. Andy decides he doesn't like all the talk pollution. But wait, there's more: Assfly cranks the irony generator to 11.
• Karajou pwned by PJR. Nice one, Philip!
• Muslims are worse than extremist Christians. Any examples to the contrary are simply exceptions to the rule!
• A nice, convenient list of people who will soon be blocked.
• Oh no, it looks like whatever Ken has is indeed contagious
• Learn Together explains why sysops hand out the day/week long blocks like fricken candy: Those are just the warnings!
• "911, what's your emergency?" "I run a conservative encyclopedia, and I'm reporting a vulgar vandal." "How vulgar?" "He put the word 'penis' into an article." "Is that all?" "He also put a link to 4chan.org into an article." "OK, we'll send a squad car out right away. Thank you for calling."
• Conservapedia's average IQ takes a hit as DanH quits in protest over the attempts to portray Obama as less than fully Christian.
• DinsdaleP: Instead of assuming what Lenski thinks, why not give him time to respond himself? Andy: Okay, I checked my watch, and it's time to STFU! Update: Thou shalt not point out that I painted myself into a corner - or else!
• "The only way this can be settled is if we have access to the genetic sequences of the bacteria colonies so that we can apply CSI techniques and determine if these "potentiated genotypes" originated through blind chance or intelligence"[1]
• Bugler tells PJR that he's not the ombudsman and shouldn't try to be!
• Apparently, PJR does not know Yiddish.
• DanH is really not thrilled about CP's apparent position on the Obama-Muslim issue.
• Congratulations, sysops Joaquín Martínez and Learn together. You finally managed to make Tom snap after weeks of endless sysop power abuse and refusal to discuss editorial direction - with predictable results. Update: Aziraphale gets gunned down for not cheering on the sysops. Uh, okay: Henry engages in damage control and reasons that if people can't complain, they can't be banned for complaining. Update: In the meantime, JM pretends that nothing ever happened.
• Fearless sysop Bohdan asks under fire editor TomMoore to do his dirty work for him. Tom may be brave but he's not stupid. Bohdan is, however, happy to sign the Moreclopedic Pleez Petition, and even suggested Tom pester CPAdmin1 to get their signature.
• Further evidence that the Assfly is a mega-self-contradictory goon.
• PJR, as he is wont to do, says the right thing.
• Ed Poor shows us his level of maturity
• Schlafly shows us the meaning of the word diligence. "I skimmed the paper, and the learned nothing from the pretty pictures. Therefore, clearly I need to skim more data." Also I don't need no biology, bitch. I'm an ENGINEER! Update Andy cops some straight talking from PJR. Update the third: Quoth Assfly "that's totally and absolutely not my transparently obvious motivation for doing this. And I'll block and revert anyone who says otherwise."
• Deborah shows us an easy way to improve our 90/10 stats. (Image backup, just in case a sysop goes on a deletion spree)
• PJR heroically pre-empts the corruption of innocent minds by filthy articles (Screenshot here, 'cause it'll vanish with time).
• Who would've thought you had to follow Wikipedia's guidelines while on Conservapedia? And why is the sysop who thinks so misapplying it? And what is stopping him from deleting its equivalent? (Old, but related: You also have to obey another Wikipedia guideline that doesn't exist on CP.)
• Can you sense a pattern? Update - or not?
• Andy looks for people to sign his letter to Lenski. Six hours later he has three: Himself, some guy named after a largely defensive weapon of gun whose user page is still a redlink, and TomMoore, a known pain in the ass. Update: Up to 20; down to 6
• Ymmotrojam isn't too happy with the "the truth shall set you free" quote because it equates Andy's views with Jesus. How long until he realizes that that's most likely exactly what Andy wanted to say?
• There no need to fear! Signed, the Trusworthy Encyclopedia.
• Conservapedia user Jack Smith dares to suggest that the burden of proof is on the Creationist. Circular reasoning soon follows. UPDATE: And the battle continues! Jack smith, shackled by the bonds of logic and the steel ball of sanity, continues to struggle to survive the onslaught from the divine warriors, defying all known laws of reality with the aid of their god! UPDATE 2: these just might be JackSmith's last words.
• How to edit an article, Joaquín Martínez style: Revert anything that happened since your last edit and continue from there. Rinse, repeat. Oh, and keep ignoring the other editors. Update: A reply! JM claims that Tom didn't "give explanations or wait for a reply"(!!!) More: Learn Together solves the conflict by only allowing JM to edit. Update: Tom is not allowed to ask Andy for input Oh, my: JM and Tom exchange blows... (scroll down to the first horizontal line) once, before JM realizes that he lost and resorts to silly taunts and threats. Full Circle: Tom asks if there are any other objections... and JM replies by silently protecting the article again. Update: Learn Together to the rescue: JM is "a man of the arts" and shouldn't be pestered by lowly editors like you, Tom!
• Sign up now to ensure Andy starts really bothering Prof. Lenski!
• DLerner, is blocked by Karajou for daring to question the quality of Andy's epistle essay
• Finally a bit of balance to Andy's bullshit article about marriage, TomMoore strikes back with Essay:Marry Someone You Love
• Mistake or being a dick? With TerryH, it has become impossible to tell, but either way, one day magically became one month. Update: TerryH confirms that it was dickery: "No accident"
• Wasn't it <sorry> Hitler </sorry> and Stalin who compiled lists of their enemies? Or was it the Mikado "I've got a little list... and you'll surely not be missed ..."?
• No, no, Koward! When he said "Irresponsible liars should not be given admin powers", he didn't mean you, although that's a natural assumptions. Blocking him and Jimmy both for "speaking truth to power" does make the connection pretty good, though.
• The Red Queen's justice: sentence first, then trial!
• So far, the list is surprisingly honest. Update: liberals are infertile sluts.