Ohio
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Of Ohio, Johnny Carson once said "Life is short, come to the state where it will seem to last the longest."
Contents |
[edit] Geography and demographics
Ohio is home to many, Christians and Damned alike. It borders five states, a Great Lake, and a Canadian province.[1] There are more than 50 Borders stores in Ohio[2]. It's only really important every four years, as a noted swing state.
[edit] Sing songs
| “ | I've got a rhyme that comes with a riddle, Ohio! What's round on the ends and high in the middle? Ohio! | ” |
| —Devo, Jocko Homo | ||
| “ | Tin soldiers and Nixon's coming, We're finally on our own This summer I hear the drumming, Four dead in Ohio. | ” |
| —Neil Young/CSNY, Ohio [3] | ||
[edit] I can C for miles and miles
All the major cities in Ohio start with a "C". No one knows why, although perhaps the people in Akron are keeping it a state secret.
[edit] Shopping
The world's most awesome supermarket, Jungle Jim's, is in Fairfield, Ohio. Once you have visited Jungle Jim's you will agree, there is no better place to purchase exotic fruits or food such as pig heads or goose testicles. This place has to be seen to be believed.
[edit] Le sports
Most importantly, Ohio is way better than Michigan at sports, as well as everything else. Unless you count the Browns.
[edit] Footnotes
- ↑ The states neighboring Ohio are Pennsylvania to the east, Michigan to the northwest, Indiana to the west, Kentucky on the south, and West Virginia on the southeast. Much of the northern border is defined by Lake Erie. Also to the north, in Canada, is Ontario.
- ↑ http://www.bordersstores.com/locator/sl_results.jsp
- ↑ The "four dead" were unarmed college students protesting the Viet Nam war, and were shot by members of the National Guard.
