Fun:Erectile dysfunction
Having a short penis, a.k.a. erectile dysfunction is a condition affecting old, white men, among others. It is the reason why annoying commercials advertising Viagra, Cialis, and various male enhancement quacks flood almost every advertising medium.
Compensating for a short penis[edit]
As an alternative to penis enlargement, some people choose to compensate with more manly behavior, or purchasing more manly things. While this does absolutely nothing to improve the size or performance of a man's sexual organs, it does generally manage to give one the notoriety of being one massive dick, or a dick head. Here are some examples of attempts to compensate for a small penis:
- Being abusive to women
- Being mean to a minor under 18, if the minor has not done something to deserve it.
- Being mean to a cheerleader under almost any circumstance
- Being mean to anyone else just to show how aggressive you are
- Purchasing really, really big trucks or SUVs
- Rolling coal
- Purchasing really, really gas-guzzling sports cars
- Purchasing lots of long, hard, manly guns
- Purchasing a big ass dog for the wrong reasons
- Joining the military for the wrong reasons
- Voting for Donald Trump
for the wrong reasons - Being a heavy handed asshole as a sysop on wiki
- Vandalizing Wikipedia
- Engaging in, or supporting, police brutality
- Being a racist or attending a Ku Klux Klan rally
- Being a jerk to clerks, waitresses, cafeteria servers, teachers, healthcare workers, sales people (if one solicited goods or services from them), police officers who aren't corrupt,[note 1] taxi/bus drivers, pastors (excluding unsolicited Mormons or Jehovah's Witnesses), government workers, and other service industry workers
- Being a bully
- Stealing a little kid's lunch money
- Shoplifting stupid crap from Wal-Mart or Target
- Committing or threatening rape, or making gratuitous rape jokes
- Defending rapists or downplaying the severity of rape
- Spreading rumors
- Engaging in road rage
- Engaging in protests for moronic causes
- Destroying the property of others
- Going on massive killing sprees on Grand Theft Auto
- Registering as a Republican
- Registering as a Democrat
- Filing frivolous lawsuits
- Participating in fantasy football
- Watching wrestling or NASCAR on TV
- Becoming a member of ISIS, supporting Sharia law, or otherwise endorsing radical Islam
- Creating a YouTube channel to propagate conspiracy theories
- Wrongfully firing or laying off employees
- Engaging in animal cruelty
- Playing the knockout game
- Being part of Gamergate
List of famous people who may have ED[edit]
While few people actually know the penis sizes of the following people, their actions seem to indicate a need to compensate for something:
- Donald Trump
- George W. Bush
- Bill Clinton
- The Amazing Atheist
- Osama Bin Laden
- Saddam Hussein
- Andrew Schlafly
- Michelle Obama
- Mormons
- Jehovah's Witnesses
- Mitt Romney
- John McCain
- Anthony Weiner
- You
See also[edit]
Notes[edit]
- ↑ Yes, these do exist.[citation NOT needed] You'd be surprised how many people believe otherwise.