Nevada

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Wild horses couldn't drag me away?
Wild horses couldn't drag me away?

Nevada is an immoral, arid quadrilateral of land in the southwestern United States desert.

This patch of parchland is notorious for several reasons:

  • Gambling is legal.
  • Prostitution is legal.
  • Las Vegas is the fastest growing city in the country, despite having no natural resources or attractions.

[edit] Fun things to do in Clark County that don't involve gambling

Boulder City is a great place to sit in your backyard and peer down on Hoover Dam Boulder Dam Hoover Dam, where with the aid of binoculars you can ogle tourists and keep a close watch out for any terrorist activity. The dam has something to do with Herbert Hoover, but we're not sure what.

Nelson is south of Boulder City, which is a great place to hide out from the New World Order; a little further south is Searchlight, whence comes Senator Harry Reid, the current leader of the Free World.

South of Searchlight can be found the thriving hamlet of Laughlin, best known for the occasional shootout involving the Hells Angels.

Squirrels, unfortunately, quickly find the hot dry climate and the lack of trees inhospitable and move on to more inviting areas.

[edit] Nevada in popliar [sic] culture

  • Viva Las Vegas!
  • Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, by Hunter S. Thompson.
  • In the 50s, one of Las Vegas' attractions was open air nuclear bomb tests.
  • "What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas" (along with your money...)
  • Reno apparently has some really inept cops.
  • Certain shadowy netizens are thought to abide there.
  • Bill Maher thinks "Vegas was better when the Mob ran it".
  • Area 51 is north-northwest of Las Vegas and can be reached by driving toward Tonopah and turning right at [THIS SECTION DELETED BY THE U.S. DEPT OF HOMELAND SECURITY].
  • Pahrump, Nevada, also known as the Kingdom of Nye, home of Art Bell when he isn't in the Phillipines.
  • Winnemucca is NOT pronounced "win-a-much-a" and its name predates legal gambling in the state.
  • "In a beautiful gesture by the beautiful people of beautiful downtown Goldfield, this radio station was named Kowalski, in honor of the last American Hero...for whom speed means freedom of the soul...the question is not when he's gonna stop, but who is gonna stop him."
  • The worst traffic in the state is the steady stream of cars headed to and from Wendover every weekend from the neighboring state of Utah. Hmm...
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