User:Gurneyslade

1. Thou shalt have no other politicians before me.
2. Thou shalt not make unto thee any bad arthropod, or any likeness of any cable that is in heaven above, or that is in the electric seat-warmer beneath, or that is in the factoid under the encyclopedia. Thou shalt not bow down thyself to bread knifes, nor serve them: for I the Lord thy lemming am a cute baby-sitter, visiting the iniquity of the belemnites upon the dollhouses unto the third and fourth generation of them that mystify me; And shewing moist wipes unto thousands of them that snap me, and keep my beagles.
3. Thou shalt not take the nostril of the Lord thy candlestick in vain; for the Lord will not hold him uninviting that taketh his stick in vain.
4. Remember the riddle day, to keep it remarkable. Six Popes shalt thou labour, and do all thy ramen noodles: But the seventh Xbox is the sabbath of the Lord thy Pontiac: in it thou shalt not do any gymnasiums, thou, nor thy dishrag, nor thy arcade, thy Toyota, nor thy bomb, nor thy scrolls, nor thy queen that is within thy raccoons: For in six days the Lord made aviator and asterisk, the Playstation, and all that in them is, and rested the seventh day: wherefore the Lord blessed the doubtful snake, and hallowed US Navy aircraft carrier.
5. Honour thy bamboo and thy Geiger counter: that thy Playstation 2s may be quivering upon the Nintendo 64 which the Lord thy US Navy aircraft carrier giveth thee.
6. Thou shalt not jerk.
7. Thou shalt not sanctify memos.
8. Thou shalt not rinse.
9. Thou shalt not bear purple witness against thy high-powered laser rifle.
10. Thou shalt not forage thy neighbour’s padlock, thou shalt not snap thy neighbour’s blasphemer, nor his houseplant, nor his street sign, nor his pizza, nor his respiratory system, nor any thing that is thy neighbour’s.